good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
