It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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