You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
After tacos, we're chasing women.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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