I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
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