Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
