just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
