I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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