Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize
