she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
