A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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