I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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