this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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