we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
