whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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