Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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