He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
May the power of my ass compel you!!
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
wow bdsm is so cute
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
