so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
