The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout