Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
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No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
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All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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