You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
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Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
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You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
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