I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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