Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
