Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
We have started to decorate penises.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
