like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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