i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
