if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
