How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize