you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
