Texts From Last Night

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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.

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  (608): You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have. http://tfl.nu/o937
  Replies (4) Good night (797) Bad night (2195)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  What should our trivia night team be named?

  (925): View more from California

  Define Statutory

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  (206): What should our trivia night team be named? (925): Define Statutory http://tfl.nu/hrvk
  Replies (27) Good night (4676) Bad night (679)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow

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  (812): My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow http://tfl.nu/ea94
  Replies (236) Good night (65842) Bad night (2793)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.

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  (864): We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game. http://tfl.nu/1oa9
  Replies (28) Good night (5396) Bad night (546)
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout

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  (712): the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout http://tfl.nu/qr0c
  Replies (14) Good night (4962) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  no, didnt close...

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...

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  (508): no, didnt close... (978): What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic... http://tfl.nu/lkpf
  Replies (13) Good night (1011) Bad night (6094)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.

  (1-785): View more from Kansas

  But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.

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  (785): He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him. (1-785): But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed. http://tfl.nu/9pjf
  Replies (26) Good night (8716) Bad night (943)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"

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  (315): I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy" http://tfl.nu/ekfn
  Replies (9) Good night (1439) Bad night (3909)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.

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  (808): Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days. http://tfl.nu/a8z9
  Replies (9) Good night (2942) Bad night (1547)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?

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  (541): Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night? http://tfl.nu/53hk
  Replies (7) Good night (3840) Bad night (908)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?

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  (318): So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt? http://tfl.nu/a1yi
  Replies (6) Good night (1342) Bad night (768)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.

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  (313): It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks. http://tfl.nu/13qa
  Replies (16) Good night (1840) Bad night (1093)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I don't  care how much you're grieving  a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior. 

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  (501): I don't  care how much you're grieving  a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.  http://tfl.nu/bx8n
  Replies (2) Good night (400) Bad night (739)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.

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  (207): So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex. http://tfl.nu/btn2
  Replies (7) Good night (1045) Bad night (278)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.

  (714): View more from California

  Who cares about New York?

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  (818): Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking. (714): Who cares about New York? http://tfl.nu/z7nj
  Replies (0) Good night (696) Bad night (255)

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