took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
