she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
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