Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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