"it" just moved
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
