No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
