Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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