no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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