i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
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