Is it because I queefed?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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