I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize