My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
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You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
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He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.