Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
