I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
More tranny stories later!
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
