It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Boobs speak an international language.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I can't turn off my feet"
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize