I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
