I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
