And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
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