its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
