i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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