i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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