So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
