He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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