ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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