were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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