My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
