Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
